Funny Religious Signs

I recently saw some funny religious signs that made me laugh. Unfortunately while driving, therefore I could not take a picture. But, do not worry, my ironclad memory will not disappoint you.

"There are some questions Google cannot answer."

Really? Like what? Oh, I bet they mean those meta questions like "why are we here?" "what is the meaning of life?" Okay, fine, ask God those questions, what answers do you get? In fact, with some careful wording, I bet Google can answer them...let's try it out.

First response: wikipedia: Meaning of Life.

Google: 1
God: 0

Next question: Will I get laid tonight? Wow, the first response is for this site. Not sure if it will work, but I will would put a lot more faith in that than by whatever responses God gives me.

Google: 2
God: 0

The next sign that made me laugh said "Who is man's real best friend? D-O-G or G-O-D"

I hate both. Dogs scare the hell out of me, and God is not real, so you know, I would choose neither as a best friend. What happens when you need a best friend, lets look at what it's like when you choose either one of these options.

Scenario: A man finds out his wife is sleeping with his brother. Calls "best friend" and they go to the bar to discuss.
Man: I am thinking about killing them both.
God:
Man: Yes, I should do it. Fuck that whore!
God:
Man: Thank you God for giving me the answer!

Does not sound like a very good "best friend" to me...

Man: I am thinking about killing them both.
Dog: Arf
Man: What the hell does that mean?
Dog: Grrr
Man: I should run away and become a pirate? What kind of nonsense is this?
Dog: Bark Bark
Man: Ah, yes, move to the forest, live in the trees.
Dog: [starts licking own balls]
Man: Fuck this, I'll just kill myself!
Dog: [continues to lick balls]

A real best friend would be a bit more useful:
Man: I am thinking about killing them both.
Dude: What the fuck are you thinking? You'll go to jail. Have a beer.
Man: Seriously, I cannot live like this.
Dude: Fuck that shit, just drink this shot. Everything will be fine. Let me get you the number for this one whore I know, she'll suck you off for like $10. I'll buy, but I'm going first.
Man: Thanks buddy, you are a good friend.

See, so it looks like God or dogs are pretty useless friends.